Most parents do not realize how scary it is to meet their child’s first girlfriend until they do. Parents want what is best for their child, and often if they are disappointed, or outright dislike their child’s choice in significant other, it is hard to hide it. This can make for a rocky relationship with the child, and a disillusionment of trust. So, here are a few tips to help you meet your teen’s first girlfriend, without the awkward moment, or relationship changing aspects.
Tip one: Keep it simple. You do not need to meet your teen’s first girlfriend over a five-course meal, where you are going to be forced to make polite conversation, and pretend to like them over a lot of courses. Even if you really like their first girlfriend, a long introduction can be tedious for all parties involved. Instead, give yourself about a ten minute window in which to meet them. You could have them stop by your house while you are on your way out to a meeting, movie, or something else with a real start time, or you could just pretend you have something. The idea here is to ease into things. If you jump into the deep end, what happens when you find out you can’t swim? Having an out gives you one if you find you need it.
Tip two: Prepare yourself beforehand. It can be overwhelming to try and understand why your teen sees something in the girl they have chosen to like. However, it is not your job to know why they like them, just that they do. So, prepare yourself for dealing with the potential of hating the person. Ask your child to see a picture before you meet the girl in person. This can help you avoid any shock over appearance. Teens do not look and dress the same way as they did when you were a kid, piercing, tattoos, clothing, etc. can all shock a parent, so prepare for those things in advance.
Tip three: Practice your acceptance face and speech. This sounds dumb, but the fact is, even if you hate the girl, you have to pretend like you don’t. Hopefully you will be genuinely surprised and like the girl a ton, but in case you don’t, practice what you will say and do so that it does not show. Why shouldn’t it show? Because teens are interesting creatures, and if you tell them they can’t have something or do something, it kind of becomes their mission to do that or have it. Teen romances are often short lived, and so it will probably putter out and die before too long, so be accepting either way. As soon as you put your foot down and say “no” you can almost guarantee that their relationship will work, it will just be a secret from you. So, if you don’t want yours sneaking out, be accepting.
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