Tween Role Models: Skanky or Appropriate?

A tween should choose role models carefully, and thus, the parents of a tween should be observant about who their tweens model themselves after. Many of today’s top tween role models are much to skanky. They give tweens the wrong message about their body, sexuality, what is age appropriate, how they should dress, how to be cool or popular, and how to treat adults. Often respect is ignored, clothing choices are scandalous, and personal morals and values go out the window.

So, are your tween’s role models too skanky? Ask yourself the following questions to determine if your tween has appropriate role models:

1. Do you want your child dressing like their role model? Many of the pop and television stars tweens have as role models today dress in decidedly skanky attire. They wear skirts too short, shorts too short, clothing too tight, clothing that is too revealing. They were clothes that have graphics or writing that portray inappropriate messages, or they dress too old for their age trying to act more mature, experienced, or sophisticated than they are. Because actions often closely follow appearance, a tween role model who dresses like a skank is never a good idea.
2. Does your tween’s role model sexualize themselves? Many of today’s tweens are at the beginnings of sexual attraction. They are just now realizing how they feel when they are attracted to someone, and are excited about the simple things like holding a hand, or stealing a glance, or a mundane conversation. What are their role models portraying as far as relationships go? Are they telling your child that in order to be cool they should have a significant other, be kissing, be sneaking out, or going steady? The skanky behavior often attached with kids that sexualize themselves too young is seen in many tween role models, and their messages could be passed to your children.
3. Is your tween’s behavior changing? Is your tween acting skanky? If they are, that is a sure sign that your kid’s role models are probably too skanky. If they start to dress in a skanky manner, disrespect adults, have too serious of relationships with members of the opposite sex, etc. then their role models need some adjusting, and you need to talk to them about the things going on in their life.

You can’t always control who your tween considers a role model, but you can talk to them about what is appropriate and inappropriate behavior. You can explain to them what you expect, and that you won’t tolerate them being skanky, no matter what someone else is doing, wearing, or saying, it is not going to fly for you. Often talking to your kids about your expectations gives you a chance to help them overcome the poor suggestions made by their role models.