Your Guide to the Definition of Tweens and What it Means

A tween is someone between the ages of 8 and 12. These are kids that are old enough to comprehend responsibility, and relationships, interaction, etc. but are not yet in the teenage years that often bring the extra privileges and responsibility. It is a transition phase from full dependence on parents, and really strong family relationships to independence, and focusing on friendships rather than family.

A tween is someone who is not yet grown up, but is not exactly a little kid any more either. It is often a time when they can seem almost bipolar in their abilities. They may be super responsible, and babysit well, or can clean a room, but then have a temper tantrum and break down like a toddler. It can be a confusing stage for not just the tween, but everyone who interacts with them.

A tween is someone who is trying to figure out their identity. These are the formulative years of adolescents. The friendships they make, the interests they develop, and the reputations they get often stick with them through the teenage years. These are the years where they really discover who they are, what they want, what they don’t want, the kind of people they enjoy being around, the kind of people they are. It is an overwhelming and exciting time of life.

 A tween is someone who is forming bonds of friendship outside the home, more than inside. Prior to this stage, most kids spend a great deal of their socializing time with family, or within the confines of their neighborhood, etc. At the tween years, suddenly those boundaries disappear or expand. Friendships become less about convenience of location, and more about who the kid wants to spend time with. Often these feel like rebellious years to parents because kids will fight them about having to spend time with family, and want to spend every waking moment with their group of friends.

A tween is someone who embraces consumerism. One of the other maladies of the tween years tends to be a move toward consumerism. At about this age, things like clothing, toys, what you have versus what your neighbor has matters.

A tween is often insecure, needy, and moody. It is a hard phase for most kids. They want the benefits of being one of the “big kids,” “adults,” “grown ups.” But they still want all the perks and responsibility free living of being a kid. They often have a hard time reconciling their desires, and figuring out who they are. This is a stage where friendships are often changed, realigned, etc. The friendship bonds made during this time often carry on through junior high and high school. It is a rough time, but can also be a great time of discovery, character development, and a perfect time to work on self esteem, and avoiding peer pressure.